Moms wCf that have given birth to

K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian

Logan was 3.5 when Scarlett was born. I found this to be a great age difference. Logan is somewhat independent and going to preschool (which he LOVES), giving me some time to spend with baby. He's also at an age where he can understand a lot of what is going on and has less jealousy issues than if they were, lets say, 2 years apart.

Having a 2nd child wasn't a hard decision but it was a scary one. I am with you - I was willing to accept some risk w/ the 1st one but way less with the 2nd one. Before getting pregnant I had irrational fears of being hospitalized for months for preterm labor, giving birth early, etc. Basically I feared anything that would take me away from Logan, even if just for a little while. I wasn't worried about my health <i>during </i>pregnancy, just being away from Logan. My health has been stable for about 10 years and all the studies point to pregnancy not adversely affecting CF decline. But if my health wasn't stable then I would not have had another baby. (for me, that would mean PFTs below 60% and/or a steady decline or frequent infections).

I fully believe that it is the parenting, not the pregnancy that can affect CF if you let it. Something interesting my doctor said was that they tend to see women do really well the first 5 years after having a baby because she tends to take better care of herself. I don't remember if she said it was a study or not (but I think it may have been). I can say it has been true for me. Prior to having Logan I was on IVs 1 to 2 times per year. I haven't had an IV for 5 years now. I think mothering is good for my health <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Something to think about - you may be at the same PFTs even if you hadn't had a baby - CF is a progressive disease after all.

Anyway, IMO good child spacing is a key part to having a 2nd child. I found parenting age 1-3 to be the hardest. After about 3 to 3.5 years old things calmed down a lot. And for me, taking care of a baby is a piece of cake. But it all depends on the child's temperament.

I can tell you that if my husband would agree to a 3rd (he won't) I would do it. But not for another 3 years and only if my health was stable at the time.

I agree with your thinking - enjoy what you have now. You don't know what the future will bring. See where you are in a year. I love to travel and traveling with 2 is way harder than with 1. But we still do it - we're going to Hawaii in a month, and Florida in 2 months.

Oh one last thought - I may not have had a 2nd child if we didn't have fantastic support from both our parents. My parents live around the corner from us and DH's parents live across town. I see my parents practically every day. They take DS to preschool, spend time with him, etc. And when baby isn't nursing so much they'll do more with her. My MIL is already itching to babysit her.

Gotta run!! (sorry if I rambled a lot)
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian

Logan was 3.5 when Scarlett was born. I found this to be a great age difference. Logan is somewhat independent and going to preschool (which he LOVES), giving me some time to spend with baby. He's also at an age where he can understand a lot of what is going on and has less jealousy issues than if they were, lets say, 2 years apart.

Having a 2nd child wasn't a hard decision but it was a scary one. I am with you - I was willing to accept some risk w/ the 1st one but way less with the 2nd one. Before getting pregnant I had irrational fears of being hospitalized for months for preterm labor, giving birth early, etc. Basically I feared anything that would take me away from Logan, even if just for a little while. I wasn't worried about my health <i>during </i>pregnancy, just being away from Logan. My health has been stable for about 10 years and all the studies point to pregnancy not adversely affecting CF decline. But if my health wasn't stable then I would not have had another baby. (for me, that would mean PFTs below 60% and/or a steady decline or frequent infections).

I fully believe that it is the parenting, not the pregnancy that can affect CF if you let it. Something interesting my doctor said was that they tend to see women do really well the first 5 years after having a baby because she tends to take better care of herself. I don't remember if she said it was a study or not (but I think it may have been). I can say it has been true for me. Prior to having Logan I was on IVs 1 to 2 times per year. I haven't had an IV for 5 years now. I think mothering is good for my health <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Something to think about - you may be at the same PFTs even if you hadn't had a baby - CF is a progressive disease after all.

Anyway, IMO good child spacing is a key part to having a 2nd child. I found parenting age 1-3 to be the hardest. After about 3 to 3.5 years old things calmed down a lot. And for me, taking care of a baby is a piece of cake. But it all depends on the child's temperament.

I can tell you that if my husband would agree to a 3rd (he won't) I would do it. But not for another 3 years and only if my health was stable at the time.

I agree with your thinking - enjoy what you have now. You don't know what the future will bring. See where you are in a year. I love to travel and traveling with 2 is way harder than with 1. But we still do it - we're going to Hawaii in a month, and Florida in 2 months.

Oh one last thought - I may not have had a 2nd child if we didn't have fantastic support from both our parents. My parents live around the corner from us and DH's parents live across town. I see my parents practically every day. They take DS to preschool, spend time with him, etc. And when baby isn't nursing so much they'll do more with her. My MIL is already itching to babysit her.

Gotta run!! (sorry if I rambled a lot)
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian

Logan was 3.5 when Scarlett was born. I found this to be a great age difference. Logan is somewhat independent and going to preschool (which he LOVES), giving me some time to spend with baby. He's also at an age where he can understand a lot of what is going on and has less jealousy issues than if they were, lets say, 2 years apart.

Having a 2nd child wasn't a hard decision but it was a scary one. I am with you - I was willing to accept some risk w/ the 1st one but way less with the 2nd one. Before getting pregnant I had irrational fears of being hospitalized for months for preterm labor, giving birth early, etc. Basically I feared anything that would take me away from Logan, even if just for a little while. I wasn't worried about my health <i>during </i>pregnancy, just being away from Logan. My health has been stable for about 10 years and all the studies point to pregnancy not adversely affecting CF decline. But if my health wasn't stable then I would not have had another baby. (for me, that would mean PFTs below 60% and/or a steady decline or frequent infections).

I fully believe that it is the parenting, not the pregnancy that can affect CF if you let it. Something interesting my doctor said was that they tend to see women do really well the first 5 years after having a baby because she tends to take better care of herself. I don't remember if she said it was a study or not (but I think it may have been). I can say it has been true for me. Prior to having Logan I was on IVs 1 to 2 times per year. I haven't had an IV for 5 years now. I think mothering is good for my health <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Something to think about - you may be at the same PFTs even if you hadn't had a baby - CF is a progressive disease after all.

Anyway, IMO good child spacing is a key part to having a 2nd child. I found parenting age 1-3 to be the hardest. After about 3 to 3.5 years old things calmed down a lot. And for me, taking care of a baby is a piece of cake. But it all depends on the child's temperament.

I can tell you that if my husband would agree to a 3rd (he won't) I would do it. But not for another 3 years and only if my health was stable at the time.

I agree with your thinking - enjoy what you have now. You don't know what the future will bring. See where you are in a year. I love to travel and traveling with 2 is way harder than with 1. But we still do it - we're going to Hawaii in a month, and Florida in 2 months.

Oh one last thought - I may not have had a 2nd child if we didn't have fantastic support from both our parents. My parents live around the corner from us and DH's parents live across town. I see my parents practically every day. They take DS to preschool, spend time with him, etc. And when baby isn't nursing so much they'll do more with her. My MIL is already itching to babysit her.

Gotta run!! (sorry if I rambled a lot)
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian

Logan was 3.5 when Scarlett was born. I found this to be a great age difference. Logan is somewhat independent and going to preschool (which he LOVES), giving me some time to spend with baby. He's also at an age where he can understand a lot of what is going on and has less jealousy issues than if they were, lets say, 2 years apart.

Having a 2nd child wasn't a hard decision but it was a scary one. I am with you - I was willing to accept some risk w/ the 1st one but way less with the 2nd one. Before getting pregnant I had irrational fears of being hospitalized for months for preterm labor, giving birth early, etc. Basically I feared anything that would take me away from Logan, even if just for a little while. I wasn't worried about my health <i>during </i>pregnancy, just being away from Logan. My health has been stable for about 10 years and all the studies point to pregnancy not adversely affecting CF decline. But if my health wasn't stable then I would not have had another baby. (for me, that would mean PFTs below 60% and/or a steady decline or frequent infections).

I fully believe that it is the parenting, not the pregnancy that can affect CF if you let it. Something interesting my doctor said was that they tend to see women do really well the first 5 years after having a baby because she tends to take better care of herself. I don't remember if she said it was a study or not (but I think it may have been). I can say it has been true for me. Prior to having Logan I was on IVs 1 to 2 times per year. I haven't had an IV for 5 years now. I think mothering is good for my health <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

Something to think about - you may be at the same PFTs even if you hadn't had a baby - CF is a progressive disease after all.

Anyway, IMO good child spacing is a key part to having a 2nd child. I found parenting age 1-3 to be the hardest. After about 3 to 3.5 years old things calmed down a lot. And for me, taking care of a baby is a piece of cake. But it all depends on the child's temperament.

I can tell you that if my husband would agree to a 3rd (he won't) I would do it. But not for another 3 years and only if my health was stable at the time.

I agree with your thinking - enjoy what you have now. You don't know what the future will bring. See where you are in a year. I love to travel and traveling with 2 is way harder than with 1. But we still do it - we're going to Hawaii in a month, and Florida in 2 months.

Oh one last thought - I may not have had a 2nd child if we didn't have fantastic support from both our parents. My parents live around the corner from us and DH's parents live across town. I see my parents practically every day. They take DS to preschool, spend time with him, etc. And when baby isn't nursing so much they'll do more with her. My MIL is already itching to babysit her.

Gotta run!! (sorry if I rambled a lot)
 
K

Keepercjr

Guest
Christian
<br />
<br />Logan was 3.5 when Scarlett was born. I found this to be a great age difference. Logan is somewhat independent and going to preschool (which he LOVES), giving me some time to spend with baby. He's also at an age where he can understand a lot of what is going on and has less jealousy issues than if they were, lets say, 2 years apart.
<br />
<br />Having a 2nd child wasn't a hard decision but it was a scary one. I am with you - I was willing to accept some risk w/ the 1st one but way less with the 2nd one. Before getting pregnant I had irrational fears of being hospitalized for months for preterm labor, giving birth early, etc. Basically I feared anything that would take me away from Logan, even if just for a little while. I wasn't worried about my health <i>during </i>pregnancy, just being away from Logan. My health has been stable for about 10 years and all the studies point to pregnancy not adversely affecting CF decline. But if my health wasn't stable then I would not have had another baby. (for me, that would mean PFTs below 60% and/or a steady decline or frequent infections).
<br />
<br />I fully believe that it is the parenting, not the pregnancy that can affect CF if you let it. Something interesting my doctor said was that they tend to see women do really well the first 5 years after having a baby because she tends to take better care of herself. I don't remember if she said it was a study or not (but I think it may have been). I can say it has been true for me. Prior to having Logan I was on IVs 1 to 2 times per year. I haven't had an IV for 5 years now. I think mothering is good for my health <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">
<br />
<br />Something to think about - you may be at the same PFTs even if you hadn't had a baby - CF is a progressive disease after all.
<br />
<br />Anyway, IMO good child spacing is a key part to having a 2nd child. I found parenting age 1-3 to be the hardest. After about 3 to 3.5 years old things calmed down a lot. And for me, taking care of a baby is a piece of cake. But it all depends on the child's temperament.
<br />
<br />I can tell you that if my husband would agree to a 3rd (he won't) I would do it. But not for another 3 years and only if my health was stable at the time.
<br />
<br />I agree with your thinking - enjoy what you have now. You don't know what the future will bring. See where you are in a year. I love to travel and traveling with 2 is way harder than with 1. But we still do it - we're going to Hawaii in a month, and Florida in 2 months.
<br />
<br />Oh one last thought - I may not have had a 2nd child if we didn't have fantastic support from both our parents. My parents live around the corner from us and DH's parents live across town. I see my parents practically every day. They take DS to preschool, spend time with him, etc. And when baby isn't nursing so much they'll do more with her. My MIL is already itching to babysit her.
<br />
<br />Gotta run!! (sorry if I rambled a lot)
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
Thanks everyone for your replies so far. I need all the info I can get.
Caroline,
Can I ask what your pfts were pre-pregnancy with each one, and after?
I agree that it is primarily parenting that affects cf, not pregnancy. (That is, if you had a basically normal pregnancy.) When my daughter was a few weeks old I remember thinking I could do this birth thing every week. Its taking care of a baby thats the harder one.
This is one of the reasons that I don't know if adoption would really make much of a difference on me health wise.
If I'm not in shape to have another baby-it may not matter if its by birth or adoption unfortunately. Its the raising of the child, not the 9 months of carrying. But thats for me, certainly not the case for everyone.
Jeana,
if you ever come across any of those studies, I'd love to see them.
There's resources out there about cf/pregnancy-but not much when it comes to a 2nd child.
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
Thanks everyone for your replies so far. I need all the info I can get.
Caroline,
Can I ask what your pfts were pre-pregnancy with each one, and after?
I agree that it is primarily parenting that affects cf, not pregnancy. (That is, if you had a basically normal pregnancy.) When my daughter was a few weeks old I remember thinking I could do this birth thing every week. Its taking care of a baby thats the harder one.
This is one of the reasons that I don't know if adoption would really make much of a difference on me health wise.
If I'm not in shape to have another baby-it may not matter if its by birth or adoption unfortunately. Its the raising of the child, not the 9 months of carrying. But thats for me, certainly not the case for everyone.
Jeana,
if you ever come across any of those studies, I'd love to see them.
There's resources out there about cf/pregnancy-but not much when it comes to a 2nd child.
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
Thanks everyone for your replies so far. I need all the info I can get.
Caroline,
Can I ask what your pfts were pre-pregnancy with each one, and after?
I agree that it is primarily parenting that affects cf, not pregnancy. (That is, if you had a basically normal pregnancy.) When my daughter was a few weeks old I remember thinking I could do this birth thing every week. Its taking care of a baby thats the harder one.
This is one of the reasons that I don't know if adoption would really make much of a difference on me health wise.
If I'm not in shape to have another baby-it may not matter if its by birth or adoption unfortunately. Its the raising of the child, not the 9 months of carrying. But thats for me, certainly not the case for everyone.
Jeana,
if you ever come across any of those studies, I'd love to see them.
There's resources out there about cf/pregnancy-but not much when it comes to a 2nd child.
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
Thanks everyone for your replies so far. I need all the info I can get.
Caroline,
Can I ask what your pfts were pre-pregnancy with each one, and after?
I agree that it is primarily parenting that affects cf, not pregnancy. (That is, if you had a basically normal pregnancy.) When my daughter was a few weeks old I remember thinking I could do this birth thing every week. Its taking care of a baby thats the harder one.
This is one of the reasons that I don't know if adoption would really make much of a difference on me health wise.
If I'm not in shape to have another baby-it may not matter if its by birth or adoption unfortunately. Its the raising of the child, not the 9 months of carrying. But thats for me, certainly not the case for everyone.
Jeana,
if you ever come across any of those studies, I'd love to see them.
There's resources out there about cf/pregnancy-but not much when it comes to a 2nd child.
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
Thanks everyone for your replies so far. I need all the info I can get.
<br />Caroline,
<br />Can I ask what your pfts were pre-pregnancy with each one, and after?
<br />I agree that it is primarily parenting that affects cf, not pregnancy. (That is, if you had a basically normal pregnancy.) When my daughter was a few weeks old I remember thinking I could do this birth thing every week. Its taking care of a baby thats the harder one.
<br />This is one of the reasons that I don't know if adoption would really make much of a difference on me health wise.
<br />If I'm not in shape to have another baby-it may not matter if its by birth or adoption unfortunately. Its the raising of the child, not the 9 months of carrying. But thats for me, certainly not the case for everyone.
<br />Jeana,
<br />if you ever come across any of those studies, I'd love to see them.
<br />There's resources out there about cf/pregnancy-but not much when it comes to a 2nd child.
 

fondreflections

New member
We all know that I don't have children; however, I can say that when I had the 3 and 4-year-old foster boys that it was VERY EXHAUSTING...

I believe that IF you really want to have another child that you should have them at least 3 years apart like Caroline and Jeana have.

Preschool really helps too. You are able to take care of yourself AND spend equal time with each child.

I learned VERY QUICKLY that children too close in age would kill me...I don't say that statement lightly either...I only really wanted to have one child, though...

Edited to add: You may have missed my whole experience with the two foster boys, but if you go to the Adult Section and seach you will find many, many posts and pleads...
 

fondreflections

New member
We all know that I don't have children; however, I can say that when I had the 3 and 4-year-old foster boys that it was VERY EXHAUSTING...

I believe that IF you really want to have another child that you should have them at least 3 years apart like Caroline and Jeana have.

Preschool really helps too. You are able to take care of yourself AND spend equal time with each child.

I learned VERY QUICKLY that children too close in age would kill me...I don't say that statement lightly either...I only really wanted to have one child, though...

Edited to add: You may have missed my whole experience with the two foster boys, but if you go to the Adult Section and seach you will find many, many posts and pleads...
 

fondreflections

New member
We all know that I don't have children; however, I can say that when I had the 3 and 4-year-old foster boys that it was VERY EXHAUSTING...

I believe that IF you really want to have another child that you should have them at least 3 years apart like Caroline and Jeana have.

Preschool really helps too. You are able to take care of yourself AND spend equal time with each child.

I learned VERY QUICKLY that children too close in age would kill me...I don't say that statement lightly either...I only really wanted to have one child, though...

Edited to add: You may have missed my whole experience with the two foster boys, but if you go to the Adult Section and seach you will find many, many posts and pleads...
 

fondreflections

New member
We all know that I don't have children; however, I can say that when I had the 3 and 4-year-old foster boys that it was VERY EXHAUSTING...

I believe that IF you really want to have another child that you should have them at least 3 years apart like Caroline and Jeana have.

Preschool really helps too. You are able to take care of yourself AND spend equal time with each child.

I learned VERY QUICKLY that children too close in age would kill me...I don't say that statement lightly either...I only really wanted to have one child, though...

Edited to add: You may have missed my whole experience with the two foster boys, but if you go to the Adult Section and seach you will find many, many posts and pleads...
 

fondreflections

New member
We all know that I don't have children; however, I can say that when I had the 3 and 4-year-old foster boys that it was VERY EXHAUSTING...
<br />
<br />I believe that IF you really want to have another child that you should have them at least 3 years apart like Caroline and Jeana have.
<br />
<br />Preschool really helps too. You are able to take care of yourself AND spend equal time with each child.
<br />
<br />I learned VERY QUICKLY that children too close in age would kill me...I don't say that statement lightly either...I only really wanted to have one child, though...
<br />
<br />Edited to add: You may have missed my whole experience with the two foster boys, but if you go to the Adult Section and seach you will find many, many posts and pleads...
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
I did miss your fostering experience Jenny-I would love to know more about it. I'll look it up-whatever it was, it sounds like it was painful from the tone of your voice here. I'm sorry.
Yes I agree with the spacing of kids. Even without Cf, I don't know how (or why????) some women do the 2 yrs apart thing. My sil has 4 kids-all 2 yrs apart, and they 'had' to be that way. Same with my mom and mil. For the last generation I think it was just the way it was, lack of birth control, lack of choice.
But nowadays...it so much harder to parent.

Something a nurse told me when I was hospitalized last summer and was crying about the 'what ifs' of future children ect was..."Christian, its quality. Not quantity.'

I tell myself that everyday.
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
I did miss your fostering experience Jenny-I would love to know more about it. I'll look it up-whatever it was, it sounds like it was painful from the tone of your voice here. I'm sorry.
Yes I agree with the spacing of kids. Even without Cf, I don't know how (or why????) some women do the 2 yrs apart thing. My sil has 4 kids-all 2 yrs apart, and they 'had' to be that way. Same with my mom and mil. For the last generation I think it was just the way it was, lack of birth control, lack of choice.
But nowadays...it so much harder to parent.

Something a nurse told me when I was hospitalized last summer and was crying about the 'what ifs' of future children ect was..."Christian, its quality. Not quantity.'

I tell myself that everyday.
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
I did miss your fostering experience Jenny-I would love to know more about it. I'll look it up-whatever it was, it sounds like it was painful from the tone of your voice here. I'm sorry.
Yes I agree with the spacing of kids. Even without Cf, I don't know how (or why????) some women do the 2 yrs apart thing. My sil has 4 kids-all 2 yrs apart, and they 'had' to be that way. Same with my mom and mil. For the last generation I think it was just the way it was, lack of birth control, lack of choice.
But nowadays...it so much harder to parent.

Something a nurse told me when I was hospitalized last summer and was crying about the 'what ifs' of future children ect was..."Christian, its quality. Not quantity.'

I tell myself that everyday.
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
I did miss your fostering experience Jenny-I would love to know more about it. I'll look it up-whatever it was, it sounds like it was painful from the tone of your voice here. I'm sorry.
Yes I agree with the spacing of kids. Even without Cf, I don't know how (or why????) some women do the 2 yrs apart thing. My sil has 4 kids-all 2 yrs apart, and they 'had' to be that way. Same with my mom and mil. For the last generation I think it was just the way it was, lack of birth control, lack of choice.
But nowadays...it so much harder to parent.

Something a nurse told me when I was hospitalized last summer and was crying about the 'what ifs' of future children ect was..."Christian, its quality. Not quantity.'

I tell myself that everyday.
 

mamaScarlett

Active member
I did miss your fostering experience Jenny-I would love to know more about it. I'll look it up-whatever it was, it sounds like it was painful from the tone of your voice here. I'm sorry.
<br />Yes I agree with the spacing of kids. Even without Cf, I don't know how (or why????) some women do the 2 yrs apart thing. My sil has 4 kids-all 2 yrs apart, and they 'had' to be that way. Same with my mom and mil. For the last generation I think it was just the way it was, lack of birth control, lack of choice.
<br />But nowadays...it so much harder to parent.
<br />
<br />Something a nurse told me when I was hospitalized last summer and was crying about the 'what ifs' of future children ect was..."Christian, its quality. Not quantity.'
<br />
<br />I tell myself that everyday.
 
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