So last night my 4 year old asked me that very question and I wasn't sure how to answer it. He knows he gets Pulmozyme and does daily chest percussions and he takes Crean 10's and a few other meds. Recently he picked up a bug, for the first time, and it was Influenza, however, until now he haven't had really lung issues. So I am just curious how to tell a child they have CF or when I should. I honestly have said very little to my son on this. I know it will come up again.
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Why do I have bad lungs Mommy?
- Thread starter Gnome
- Start date
So last night my 4 year old asked me that very question and I wasn't sure how to answer it. He knows he gets Pulmozyme and does daily chest percussions and he takes Crean 10's and a few other meds. Recently he picked up a bug, for the first time, and it was Influenza, however, until now he haven't had really lung issues. So I am just curious how to tell a child they have CF or when I should. I honestly have said very little to my son on this. I know it will come up again.
So last night my 4 year old asked me that very question and I wasn't sure how to answer it. He knows he gets Pulmozyme and does daily chest percussions and he takes Crean 10's and a few other meds. Recently he picked up a bug, for the first time, and it was Influenza, however, until now he haven't had really lung issues. So I am just curious how to tell a child they have CF or when I should. I honestly have said very little to my son on this. I know it will come up again.
So last night my 4 year old asked me that very question and I wasn't sure how to answer it. He knows he gets Pulmozyme and does daily chest percussions and he takes Crean 10's and a few other meds. Recently he picked up a bug, for the first time, and it was Influenza, however, until now he haven't had really lung issues. So I am just curious how to tell a child they have CF or when I should. I honestly have said very little to my son on this. I know it will come up again.
So last night my 4 year old asked me that very question and I wasn't sure how to answer it. He knows he gets Pulmozyme and does daily chest percussions and he takes Crean 10's and a few other meds. Recently he picked up a bug, for the first time, and it was Influenza, however, until now he haven't had really lung issues. So I am just curious how to tell a child they have CF or when I should. I honestly have said very little to my son on this. I know it will come up again.
We answered our daughter's questions (she's 28 now) as they came up. We answered only the immediate question and didn't elaborate, especially when she was young.
This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
We answered our daughter's questions (she's 28 now) as they came up. We answered only the immediate question and didn't elaborate, especially when she was young.
This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
We answered our daughter's questions (she's 28 now) as they came up. We answered only the immediate question and didn't elaborate, especially when she was young.
This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
We answered our daughter's questions (she's 28 now) as they came up. We answered only the immediate question and didn't elaborate, especially when she was young.
This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
We answered our daughter's questions (she's 28 now) as they came up. We answered only the immediate question and didn't elaborate, especially when she was young.
<br />
<br />This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
<br />
<br />When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
<br />
<br />It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />This is a crucial part of helping your son accept what he has and the more normally you answer him, the more normal he'll feel. He'll also take on your attitude and that's how he'll talk to his friends and other people about it.
<br />
<br />When Amy asked about her lungs, we said 'you have Cystic Fibrosis. It's a disease that makes your lungs get infections.' That was it and she was completely satisfied.
<br />
<br />It's sort-of a building process of information. Your son will ask another question at some time, then you'd answer it simply and as time goes on, he'll have all the information he needs at the appropriate time.
<br />
<br />
I think it's important to hear the term 'cystic fibrosis' from early on. If they don't hear it from us in a matter of fact way, they certainly will hear it (and sooner than we think they will) from others- at the dr appts, from relatives and friends, and at school. Hearing from us in a matter of fact way (as posted) is likely to be accepted; hearing from others may be upsetting or confusing to them.
If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
I think it's important to hear the term 'cystic fibrosis' from early on. If they don't hear it from us in a matter of fact way, they certainly will hear it (and sooner than we think they will) from others- at the dr appts, from relatives and friends, and at school. Hearing from us in a matter of fact way (as posted) is likely to be accepted; hearing from others may be upsetting or confusing to them.
If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
I think it's important to hear the term 'cystic fibrosis' from early on. If they don't hear it from us in a matter of fact way, they certainly will hear it (and sooner than we think they will) from others- at the dr appts, from relatives and friends, and at school. Hearing from us in a matter of fact way (as posted) is likely to be accepted; hearing from others may be upsetting or confusing to them.
If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
I think it's important to hear the term 'cystic fibrosis' from early on. If they don't hear it from us in a matter of fact way, they certainly will hear it (and sooner than we think they will) from others- at the dr appts, from relatives and friends, and at school. Hearing from us in a matter of fact way (as posted) is likely to be accepted; hearing from others may be upsetting or confusing to them.
If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
I think it's important to hear the term 'cystic fibrosis' from early on. If they don't hear it from us in a matter of fact way, they certainly will hear it (and sooner than we think they will) from others- at the dr appts, from relatives and friends, and at school. Hearing from us in a matter of fact way (as posted) is likely to be accepted; hearing from others may be upsetting or confusing to them.
<br />
<br />If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
<br />
<br />I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
<br />
<br />If you explain to him that 'You have CF, and it makes it hard for your lungs to always work as well as they should (or whatever) and that is why you (fill in the blank... do your vest every day, do nebs, etc) to help stay healthy' it will likely accomplish two things- putting a name to his condition & reasons for his treatments may help encourage compliance as time goes on, and may be a relief- odds are he's already heard the term (even if he hasn't let on) and not quite understood what it meant.
<br />
<br />I wish you the very best in this... it can be a very hard part of raising a kid with a chronic health condition to know what and how much to tell them. There's a good thread talking about some of this in the Parenting forum too: <a target=_blank class=ftalternatingbarlinklarge href="http://www.cysticfibrosis.com/forums/messageview.cfm?catid=3876&threadid=52439&enterthread=y">What Do I Tell a 4yr old About CF?</a>
mamaScarlett
Active member
I have Cf-I'm a 28 yr old mom. So I can give you the other side of the fence perspective. I think about those questions too-but the questions I'll deal with are:"why are your lungs bad, mommy...or why are you always at the hospital..."
I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.
I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.
mamaScarlett
Active member
I have Cf-I'm a 28 yr old mom. So I can give you the other side of the fence perspective. I think about those questions too-but the questions I'll deal with are:"why are your lungs bad, mommy...or why are you always at the hospital..."
I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.
I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.
mamaScarlett
Active member
I have Cf-I'm a 28 yr old mom. So I can give you the other side of the fence perspective. I think about those questions too-but the questions I'll deal with are:"why are your lungs bad, mommy...or why are you always at the hospital..."
I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.
I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.
mamaScarlett
Active member
I have Cf-I'm a 28 yr old mom. So I can give you the other side of the fence perspective. I think about those questions too-but the questions I'll deal with are:"why are your lungs bad, mommy...or why are you always at the hospital..."
I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.
I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.
mamaScarlett
Active member
I have Cf-I'm a 28 yr old mom. So I can give you the other side of the fence perspective. I think about those questions too-but the questions I'll deal with are:"why are your lungs bad, mommy...or why are you always at the hospital..."
<br />
<br />I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
<br />
<br />Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
<br />
<br />I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
<br />
<br />But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
<br />
<br />You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
<br />
<br />One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
<br />
<br />For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
<br />
<br />Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.
<br />
<br />I'm not one of those pwcf that believes on giving the 'cold hard facts'. I believe in giving the facts, the truth. But not cold and not hard. Tailored to the right age.
<br />
<br />Simply bc children are not capable of emotionally dealing with 'facts and truth' the way adults are. I was always told the truth about my Cf as a child. 'Cf is a serious health problem, your lungs can't fight off colds and bugs the way others can so you need special people and special meds to help you'...'Thats why we do this treatment every day-so you can be healthy'. My mom also told me I didn't do anything wrong to bring it on myself-it just happened. She also always told me I could do whatever I wanted in life. If my brothers had to carry fire wood into the house in winter-I had to too.
<br />
<br />I don't believe in telling young children that Cf will kill them, could kill them, ect. Or in 'threatening' with hospital tales. Small children are not able to process and understand that. I've seen some pwcf that were given what some people call 'the facts' at too young an age, and it can go 1 of 2 ways...the child will somehow be able to handle it (rarely I feel) and they adjust and move on.
<br />
<br />But I think more often you see kids grow up, reach the teen 'rebel' years and they lose it. They say, well according to what I've been told, I'm going to die anyway, (wrongly assuming that) so I'm not going to do these dumb treatments...I'm going to party, do what I want...come what may. Obviously thats the opposite of what pwcf need and I've known more than a few pwcf that do irreversible damage during those hard teen years.
<br />
<br />You've already gotten some great advice. Go with your gut when you speak to your son. Remember he's only 4! You'll help him build the facts of his life little by little.
<br />
<br />One tactic my mom used on me that worked when I was little was the 'do it bc I say so' thing. And whether your child has cf or not, all parents do this now and then. If your lo asks you why he has to brush his teeth-you say, 'so we can keep our teeth clean'. The lo says..why...You say 'so we can be healthy'. If it persists you say-'I've told you why, and now you just have to do it'.
<br />
<br />For a pwcf's life-doing pt, taking pills, will be part of every day life. Like brushing teeth, making the bed and so on. Its part of our day and we do it. Sometimes we as parents tend to worry and over think answers in life but little kids are pretty one dimensional in thinking sometimes.
<br />
<br />Btw, You parents of cfers have the hardest job in the world and I respect you so much.