Family germ exposure issues

Liza · Dec 10, 2008

I am so sorry that your sister is being such a pain. I have to agree with Sakem. Go to the family Christmas event and if she doesn't like it, she can leave.

I wondered myself if maybe your sister had a problem with Becca being adopted. She should know better if she works with CF kids. Makes me wonder what kind of nurse she is to those kids.

I hope you have a great Christmas with or without your sister.

Liza · Dec 10, 2008

I am so sorry that your sister is being such a pain. I have to agree with Sakem. Go to the family Christmas event and if she doesn't like it, she can leave.

I wondered myself if maybe your sister had a problem with Becca being adopted. She should know better if she works with CF kids. Makes me wonder what kind of nurse she is to those kids.

I hope you have a great Christmas with or without your sister.

Liza · Dec 10, 2008

I am so sorry that your sister is being such a pain. I have to agree with Sakem. Go to the family Christmas event and if she doesn't like it, she can leave.

I wondered myself if maybe your sister had a problem with Becca being adopted. She should know better if she works with CF kids. Makes me wonder what kind of nurse she is to those kids.

I hope you have a great Christmas with or without your sister.

Liza · Dec 10, 2008

I am so sorry that your sister is being such a pain. I have to agree with Sakem. Go to the family Christmas event and if she doesn't like it, she can leave.

I wondered myself if maybe your sister had a problem with Becca being adopted. She should know better if she works with CF kids. Makes me wonder what kind of nurse she is to those kids.

I hope you have a great Christmas with or without your sister.

Liza · Dec 10, 2008

I am so sorry that your sister is being such a pain. I have to agree with Sakem. Go to the family Christmas event and if she doesn't like it, she can leave.
 
 I wondered myself if maybe your sister had a problem with Becca being adopted. She should know better if she works with CF kids. Makes me wonder what kind of nurse she is to those kids.
 
 I hope you have a great Christmas with or without your sister.

grassisgreener · Dec 10, 2008

THat is just insane. Since she is educated about CF, it must be more than the imginary threat of CF germs to her baby. It could be that she is jealous of the attention Becca gets bc she is adopted and bc of her CF, or just that she is adopted bothers her, who knows. What you should decide is whether it is worth it to continue celebrating holidays with your family or not. It seems like this year might be a turning point bc if you give in to your sister now and not come, she may pull this every year. I was adopted and never felt like I was anything but blood related to all of my extended family, that is how your daughter should feel too. Also, I will NOT stand for my daughter wcf being made feel like someone less bc of CF by anyone and I can't help but wonder if your daughter will pick up on this stuff as she gets older. My heart goes out to you as I can only imagine how hard this is.

grassisgreener · Dec 10, 2008

THat is just insane. Since she is educated about CF, it must be more than the imginary threat of CF germs to her baby. It could be that she is jealous of the attention Becca gets bc she is adopted and bc of her CF, or just that she is adopted bothers her, who knows. What you should decide is whether it is worth it to continue celebrating holidays with your family or not. It seems like this year might be a turning point bc if you give in to your sister now and not come, she may pull this every year. I was adopted and never felt like I was anything but blood related to all of my extended family, that is how your daughter should feel too. Also, I will NOT stand for my daughter wcf being made feel like someone less bc of CF by anyone and I can't help but wonder if your daughter will pick up on this stuff as she gets older. My heart goes out to you as I can only imagine how hard this is.

grassisgreener · Dec 10, 2008

THat is just insane. Since she is educated about CF, it must be more than the imginary threat of CF germs to her baby. It could be that she is jealous of the attention Becca gets bc she is adopted and bc of her CF, or just that she is adopted bothers her, who knows. What you should decide is whether it is worth it to continue celebrating holidays with your family or not. It seems like this year might be a turning point bc if you give in to your sister now and not come, she may pull this every year. I was adopted and never felt like I was anything but blood related to all of my extended family, that is how your daughter should feel too. Also, I will NOT stand for my daughter wcf being made feel like someone less bc of CF by anyone and I can't help but wonder if your daughter will pick up on this stuff as she gets older. My heart goes out to you as I can only imagine how hard this is.

grassisgreener · Dec 10, 2008

THat is just insane. Since she is educated about CF, it must be more than the imginary threat of CF germs to her baby. It could be that she is jealous of the attention Becca gets bc she is adopted and bc of her CF, or just that she is adopted bothers her, who knows. What you should decide is whether it is worth it to continue celebrating holidays with your family or not. It seems like this year might be a turning point bc if you give in to your sister now and not come, she may pull this every year. I was adopted and never felt like I was anything but blood related to all of my extended family, that is how your daughter should feel too. Also, I will NOT stand for my daughter wcf being made feel like someone less bc of CF by anyone and I can't help but wonder if your daughter will pick up on this stuff as she gets older. My heart goes out to you as I can only imagine how hard this is.

grassisgreener · Dec 10, 2008

THat is just insane. Since she is educated about CF, it must be more than the imginary threat of CF germs to her baby. It could be that she is jealous of the attention Becca gets bc she is adopted and bc of her CF, or just that she is adopted bothers her, who knows. What you should decide is whether it is worth it to continue celebrating holidays with your family or not. It seems like this year might be a turning point bc if you give in to your sister now and not come, she may pull this every year. I was adopted and never felt like I was anything but blood related to all of my extended family, that is how your daughter should feel too. Also, I will NOT stand for my daughter wcf being made feel like someone less bc of CF by anyone and I can't help but wonder if your daughter will pick up on this stuff as she gets older. My heart goes out to you as I can only imagine how hard this is.

Nightwriter · Dec 11, 2008

If what I am reading correctly, the Christmas is at your house with your whole family? Or at least I guess at a nearby relative's house. I would say to her, "We're all going to miss you this year. We'll see you next year you when you think it is safe to take your baby out into the world."

She's the one with the problem. Not you. You should enjoy your Christmas with your daughter and whomever is coming to celebrate. The way you present your child in the world will set the pattern for the future. I would not skip Christmas and hold this over someone in the future.

If as an educated nurse, working with CF patients, she holds ignorant feelings like this, she has bigger problems than you can help her with. I wouldn't let anybody's emotional problems dictate how I was going to run my life.

She is your sister and that is a dear relationship -- one I would never give up. You will get through this bumpy phase. But you must stand your ground.

Where is the Christmas spirit?

Nightwriter · Dec 11, 2008

If what I am reading correctly, the Christmas is at your house with your whole family? Or at least I guess at a nearby relative's house. I would say to her, "We're all going to miss you this year. We'll see you next year you when you think it is safe to take your baby out into the world."

She's the one with the problem. Not you. You should enjoy your Christmas with your daughter and whomever is coming to celebrate. The way you present your child in the world will set the pattern for the future. I would not skip Christmas and hold this over someone in the future.

If as an educated nurse, working with CF patients, she holds ignorant feelings like this, she has bigger problems than you can help her with. I wouldn't let anybody's emotional problems dictate how I was going to run my life.

She is your sister and that is a dear relationship -- one I would never give up. You will get through this bumpy phase. But you must stand your ground.

Where is the Christmas spirit?

Nightwriter · Dec 11, 2008

If what I am reading correctly, the Christmas is at your house with your whole family? Or at least I guess at a nearby relative's house. I would say to her, "We're all going to miss you this year. We'll see you next year you when you think it is safe to take your baby out into the world."

She's the one with the problem. Not you. You should enjoy your Christmas with your daughter and whomever is coming to celebrate. The way you present your child in the world will set the pattern for the future. I would not skip Christmas and hold this over someone in the future.

If as an educated nurse, working with CF patients, she holds ignorant feelings like this, she has bigger problems than you can help her with. I wouldn't let anybody's emotional problems dictate how I was going to run my life.

She is your sister and that is a dear relationship -- one I would never give up. You will get through this bumpy phase. But you must stand your ground.

Where is the Christmas spirit?

Nightwriter · Dec 11, 2008

If what I am reading correctly, the Christmas is at your house with your whole family? Or at least I guess at a nearby relative's house. I would say to her, "We're all going to miss you this year. We'll see you next year you when you think it is safe to take your baby out into the world."

She's the one with the problem. Not you. You should enjoy your Christmas with your daughter and whomever is coming to celebrate. The way you present your child in the world will set the pattern for the future. I would not skip Christmas and hold this over someone in the future.

If as an educated nurse, working with CF patients, she holds ignorant feelings like this, she has bigger problems than you can help her with. I wouldn't let anybody's emotional problems dictate how I was going to run my life.

She is your sister and that is a dear relationship -- one I would never give up. You will get through this bumpy phase. But you must stand your ground.

Where is the Christmas spirit?

Nightwriter · Dec 11, 2008

If what I am reading correctly, the Christmas is at your house with your whole family? Or at least I guess at a nearby relative's house. I would say to her, "We're all going to miss you this year. We'll see you next year you when you think it is safe to take your baby out into the world."
 
 She's the one with the problem. Not you. You should enjoy your Christmas with your daughter and whomever is coming to celebrate. The way you present your child in the world will set the pattern for the future. I would not skip Christmas and hold this over someone in the future.
 
 If as an educated nurse, working with CF patients, she holds ignorant feelings like this, she has bigger problems than you can help her with. I wouldn't let anybody's emotional problems dictate how I was going to run my life.
 
 She is your sister and that is a dear relationship -- one I would never give up. You will get through this bumpy phase. But you must stand your ground.
 
 Where is the Christmas spirit?

babyluke · Dec 16, 2008

I don't think that I can say anything that hasn't already been said other that just to sympathize with you. My husband and I have adopted 6 children and we have one biological son who has CF. Luckily our family has been proactive about protecting Luke and very accepting and supportive of that, but felt we should give up our other children (the adoptions were not final when he was diagnosed) in order to protect him from too many germs. The thing is, I don't want Luke to live life in a bubble, whatever his life is--long or short--I want it to be full and rich and fun and meaningful. I want that for all my children. And there are not warranties on kids. People have healthy children every day and are lulled into that sense of security and then that baby becomes a four year old cancer patient. You cannot protect your children from everything. You would be a fool to try. So isn't it better to look back on life and have no regrets about how you have treated people and how you have taught your children to treat people? Maybe you should remind you sister of this: "There but for the grace of God, go I." God bless you. Whatever happens, I hope you have a beautiful Christmas with your family with the peace of knowing you are doing the right thing.
Angela, mom of 8, 18 month old son with CF

babyluke · Dec 16, 2008

I don't think that I can say anything that hasn't already been said other that just to sympathize with you. My husband and I have adopted 6 children and we have one biological son who has CF. Luckily our family has been proactive about protecting Luke and very accepting and supportive of that, but felt we should give up our other children (the adoptions were not final when he was diagnosed) in order to protect him from too many germs. The thing is, I don't want Luke to live life in a bubble, whatever his life is--long or short--I want it to be full and rich and fun and meaningful. I want that for all my children. And there are not warranties on kids. People have healthy children every day and are lulled into that sense of security and then that baby becomes a four year old cancer patient. You cannot protect your children from everything. You would be a fool to try. So isn't it better to look back on life and have no regrets about how you have treated people and how you have taught your children to treat people? Maybe you should remind you sister of this: "There but for the grace of God, go I." God bless you. Whatever happens, I hope you have a beautiful Christmas with your family with the peace of knowing you are doing the right thing.
Angela, mom of 8, 18 month old son with CF

babyluke · Dec 16, 2008

I don't think that I can say anything that hasn't already been said other that just to sympathize with you. My husband and I have adopted 6 children and we have one biological son who has CF. Luckily our family has been proactive about protecting Luke and very accepting and supportive of that, but felt we should give up our other children (the adoptions were not final when he was diagnosed) in order to protect him from too many germs. The thing is, I don't want Luke to live life in a bubble, whatever his life is--long or short--I want it to be full and rich and fun and meaningful. I want that for all my children. And there are not warranties on kids. People have healthy children every day and are lulled into that sense of security and then that baby becomes a four year old cancer patient. You cannot protect your children from everything. You would be a fool to try. So isn't it better to look back on life and have no regrets about how you have treated people and how you have taught your children to treat people? Maybe you should remind you sister of this: "There but for the grace of God, go I." God bless you. Whatever happens, I hope you have a beautiful Christmas with your family with the peace of knowing you are doing the right thing.
Angela, mom of 8, 18 month old son with CF

babyluke · Dec 16, 2008

I don't think that I can say anything that hasn't already been said other that just to sympathize with you. My husband and I have adopted 6 children and we have one biological son who has CF. Luckily our family has been proactive about protecting Luke and very accepting and supportive of that, but felt we should give up our other children (the adoptions were not final when he was diagnosed) in order to protect him from too many germs. The thing is, I don't want Luke to live life in a bubble, whatever his life is--long or short--I want it to be full and rich and fun and meaningful. I want that for all my children. And there are not warranties on kids. People have healthy children every day and are lulled into that sense of security and then that baby becomes a four year old cancer patient. You cannot protect your children from everything. You would be a fool to try. So isn't it better to look back on life and have no regrets about how you have treated people and how you have taught your children to treat people? Maybe you should remind you sister of this: "There but for the grace of God, go I." God bless you. Whatever happens, I hope you have a beautiful Christmas with your family with the peace of knowing you are doing the right thing.
Angela, mom of 8, 18 month old son with CF

babyluke · Dec 16, 2008

I don't think that I can say anything that hasn't already been said other that just to sympathize with you. My husband and I have adopted 6 children and we have one biological son who has CF. Luckily our family has been proactive about protecting Luke and very accepting and supportive of that, but felt we should give up our other children (the adoptions were not final when he was diagnosed) in order to protect him from too many germs. The thing is, I don't want Luke to live life in a bubble, whatever his life is--long or short--I want it to be full and rich and fun and meaningful. I want that for all my children. And there are not warranties on kids. People have healthy children every day and are lulled into that sense of security and then that baby becomes a four year old cancer patient. You cannot protect your children from everything. You would be a fool to try. So isn't it better to look back on life and have no regrets about how you have treated people and how you have taught your children to treat people? Maybe you should remind you sister of this: "There but for the grace of God, go I." God bless you. Whatever happens, I hope you have a beautiful Christmas with your family with the peace of knowing you are doing the right thing.
 Angela, mom of 8, 18 month old son with CF

Family germ exposure issues

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