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if you knew your unborn child had cf would you abort it
- Thread starter Ricky123
- Start date
I don't think I could for reasons many of you stated already. Case in point, if my child were a Down's baby I would embrace him or her and optimize my child's life in any way possible. The only way I would consider abortion is if my child was going to be born without a brain, a condition called anecephaly (?sp), just a brain stem. That child would have absolutely no quality of life, only its basic life functions and invariably, they die within their first few months of life. They don't smile, have emotions...nothing a baby would have. Even if my unborn child was found to have severe congenital defects, I would give him or her a chance, I have seen amazing things done to these kids. I know of ne in particular, she was born with a giant oomphacele, meaning that all of her organs were outside of her instead of inside. She was expected to die, right now, she is 6 and doing well. She needs tube feedings, had major lung issues (had a trach and vent until she was 4, but is decannulated now) but she attends school and is smart as a whip. Her parents were given the option of abortion but they too wanted to give her a chance despite the slim chances they were given that their girl would live. It really is a personal decision though, either way it is a difficult choice. Jenn
I don't think I could for reasons many of you stated already. Case in point, if my child were a Down's baby I would embrace him or her and optimize my child's life in any way possible. The only way I would consider abortion is if my child was going to be born without a brain, a condition called anecephaly (?sp), just a brain stem. That child would have absolutely no quality of life, only its basic life functions and invariably, they die within their first few months of life. They don't smile, have emotions...nothing a baby would have. Even if my unborn child was found to have severe congenital defects, I would give him or her a chance, I have seen amazing things done to these kids. I know of ne in particular, she was born with a giant oomphacele, meaning that all of her organs were outside of her instead of inside. She was expected to die, right now, she is 6 and doing well. She needs tube feedings, had major lung issues (had a trach and vent until she was 4, but is decannulated now) but she attends school and is smart as a whip. Her parents were given the option of abortion but they too wanted to give her a chance despite the slim chances they were given that their girl would live. It really is a personal decision though, either way it is a difficult choice. Jenn
I don't think I could for reasons many of you stated already. Case in point, if my child were a Down's baby I would embrace him or her and optimize my child's life in any way possible. The only way I would consider abortion is if my child was going to be born without a brain, a condition called anecephaly (?sp), just a brain stem. That child would have absolutely no quality of life, only its basic life functions and invariably, they die within their first few months of life. They don't smile, have emotions...nothing a baby would have. Even if my unborn child was found to have severe congenital defects, I would give him or her a chance, I have seen amazing things done to these kids. I know of ne in particular, she was born with a giant oomphacele, meaning that all of her organs were outside of her instead of inside. She was expected to die, right now, she is 6 and doing well. She needs tube feedings, had major lung issues (had a trach and vent until she was 4, but is decannulated now) but she attends school and is smart as a whip. Her parents were given the option of abortion but they too wanted to give her a chance despite the slim chances they were given that their girl would live. It really is a personal decision though, either way it is a difficult choice. Jenn
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Emily65Roses</b></i>
Just because someone discourages bringing more CF children into the world does not mean they are saying you aren't worth as much as "normal" people. I would, in fact, argue quite the opposite. If someone enjoyed watching you suffer, they'd suggest having more CF children. If they see you suffering and don't like it, they are more likely to discourage it.
<i>Edited to add: I am not saying a person should or shouldn't abort a CF fetus, I am merely responding to a reply a few before mine.</i></end quote></div>
Part of it was her dissmissive attitude. This was a prepregnancy consultation. She knew we were going to have genetic testing beforehand, and that if my DH was a carrier, we wouldn't be trying.
I told her how I felt, (and in no uncertain terms) and she obviously thought that a life that would have suffering in it would be a life not worth living, to the point of killing a child before he/she was born. She also implied that I didn't know my own mind (ever have a dr. like that? Grr...) and would change it if faced with the reality- even though we wouldn't be doing the testing during pregnancy? She just <i>assumed</i> we would be doing the tests, too...
I want a high risk ob/gyn who is going to do everything she can for me and my unborn child, without me having that thought in the back of my head that if my child came back with cf or another potentially devastating disease, that she would be thinking that if something went wrong with my pregnancy, it would be for the best instead of having full confidence in her that she would exhaust all possible solutions and fully inform me of what they are. Doctors are human, and people put more effort into things they believe in.
Sorry, but someone who looks at me in my rare, but as the meds improve, increasingly less rare good health, and still would have advised my mother to abort me based solely on genetic testing, kinda pisses me off. When I was born, the doctors told my parents I wouldn't live past 3. When I went for the consultation, I believe the median was late 20's, early 30's (would have to look that up).
Even now that I'm not as healthy as I was 13 years ago, it still irks me. If I had a child with cf, it would be up to my child to decide when to quit fighting, it's not up to me before she's even born. IMHO <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> . To me, once a child is conceived (and especially at the point where they can do the testing) he/she is already "in this world", and deserves just as much of a chance at life as a cf child whose parents didn't know she had cf before she was born. Again, IMHO; not trying to make anyone mad or hurt anyone's feelings <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> .
Just because someone discourages bringing more CF children into the world does not mean they are saying you aren't worth as much as "normal" people. I would, in fact, argue quite the opposite. If someone enjoyed watching you suffer, they'd suggest having more CF children. If they see you suffering and don't like it, they are more likely to discourage it.
<i>Edited to add: I am not saying a person should or shouldn't abort a CF fetus, I am merely responding to a reply a few before mine.</i></end quote></div>
Part of it was her dissmissive attitude. This was a prepregnancy consultation. She knew we were going to have genetic testing beforehand, and that if my DH was a carrier, we wouldn't be trying.
I told her how I felt, (and in no uncertain terms) and she obviously thought that a life that would have suffering in it would be a life not worth living, to the point of killing a child before he/she was born. She also implied that I didn't know my own mind (ever have a dr. like that? Grr...) and would change it if faced with the reality- even though we wouldn't be doing the testing during pregnancy? She just <i>assumed</i> we would be doing the tests, too...
I want a high risk ob/gyn who is going to do everything she can for me and my unborn child, without me having that thought in the back of my head that if my child came back with cf or another potentially devastating disease, that she would be thinking that if something went wrong with my pregnancy, it would be for the best instead of having full confidence in her that she would exhaust all possible solutions and fully inform me of what they are. Doctors are human, and people put more effort into things they believe in.
Sorry, but someone who looks at me in my rare, but as the meds improve, increasingly less rare good health, and still would have advised my mother to abort me based solely on genetic testing, kinda pisses me off. When I was born, the doctors told my parents I wouldn't live past 3. When I went for the consultation, I believe the median was late 20's, early 30's (would have to look that up).
Even now that I'm not as healthy as I was 13 years ago, it still irks me. If I had a child with cf, it would be up to my child to decide when to quit fighting, it's not up to me before she's even born. IMHO <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> . To me, once a child is conceived (and especially at the point where they can do the testing) he/she is already "in this world", and deserves just as much of a chance at life as a cf child whose parents didn't know she had cf before she was born. Again, IMHO; not trying to make anyone mad or hurt anyone's feelings <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> .
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Emily65Roses</b></i>
Just because someone discourages bringing more CF children into the world does not mean they are saying you aren't worth as much as "normal" people. I would, in fact, argue quite the opposite. If someone enjoyed watching you suffer, they'd suggest having more CF children. If they see you suffering and don't like it, they are more likely to discourage it.
<i>Edited to add: I am not saying a person should or shouldn't abort a CF fetus, I am merely responding to a reply a few before mine.</i></end quote></div>
Part of it was her dissmissive attitude. This was a prepregnancy consultation. She knew we were going to have genetic testing beforehand, and that if my DH was a carrier, we wouldn't be trying.
I told her how I felt, (and in no uncertain terms) and she obviously thought that a life that would have suffering in it would be a life not worth living, to the point of killing a child before he/she was born. She also implied that I didn't know my own mind (ever have a dr. like that? Grr...) and would change it if faced with the reality- even though we wouldn't be doing the testing during pregnancy? She just <i>assumed</i> we would be doing the tests, too...
I want a high risk ob/gyn who is going to do everything she can for me and my unborn child, without me having that thought in the back of my head that if my child came back with cf or another potentially devastating disease, that she would be thinking that if something went wrong with my pregnancy, it would be for the best instead of having full confidence in her that she would exhaust all possible solutions and fully inform me of what they are. Doctors are human, and people put more effort into things they believe in.
Sorry, but someone who looks at me in my rare, but as the meds improve, increasingly less rare good health, and still would have advised my mother to abort me based solely on genetic testing, kinda pisses me off. When I was born, the doctors told my parents I wouldn't live past 3. When I went for the consultation, I believe the median was late 20's, early 30's (would have to look that up).
Even now that I'm not as healthy as I was 13 years ago, it still irks me. If I had a child with cf, it would be up to my child to decide when to quit fighting, it's not up to me before she's even born. IMHO <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> . To me, once a child is conceived (and especially at the point where they can do the testing) he/she is already "in this world", and deserves just as much of a chance at life as a cf child whose parents didn't know she had cf before she was born. Again, IMHO; not trying to make anyone mad or hurt anyone's feelings <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> .
Just because someone discourages bringing more CF children into the world does not mean they are saying you aren't worth as much as "normal" people. I would, in fact, argue quite the opposite. If someone enjoyed watching you suffer, they'd suggest having more CF children. If they see you suffering and don't like it, they are more likely to discourage it.
<i>Edited to add: I am not saying a person should or shouldn't abort a CF fetus, I am merely responding to a reply a few before mine.</i></end quote></div>
Part of it was her dissmissive attitude. This was a prepregnancy consultation. She knew we were going to have genetic testing beforehand, and that if my DH was a carrier, we wouldn't be trying.
I told her how I felt, (and in no uncertain terms) and she obviously thought that a life that would have suffering in it would be a life not worth living, to the point of killing a child before he/she was born. She also implied that I didn't know my own mind (ever have a dr. like that? Grr...) and would change it if faced with the reality- even though we wouldn't be doing the testing during pregnancy? She just <i>assumed</i> we would be doing the tests, too...
I want a high risk ob/gyn who is going to do everything she can for me and my unborn child, without me having that thought in the back of my head that if my child came back with cf or another potentially devastating disease, that she would be thinking that if something went wrong with my pregnancy, it would be for the best instead of having full confidence in her that she would exhaust all possible solutions and fully inform me of what they are. Doctors are human, and people put more effort into things they believe in.
Sorry, but someone who looks at me in my rare, but as the meds improve, increasingly less rare good health, and still would have advised my mother to abort me based solely on genetic testing, kinda pisses me off. When I was born, the doctors told my parents I wouldn't live past 3. When I went for the consultation, I believe the median was late 20's, early 30's (would have to look that up).
Even now that I'm not as healthy as I was 13 years ago, it still irks me. If I had a child with cf, it would be up to my child to decide when to quit fighting, it's not up to me before she's even born. IMHO <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> . To me, once a child is conceived (and especially at the point where they can do the testing) he/she is already "in this world", and deserves just as much of a chance at life as a cf child whose parents didn't know she had cf before she was born. Again, IMHO; not trying to make anyone mad or hurt anyone's feelings <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> .
<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Emily65Roses</b></i>
Just because someone discourages bringing more CF children into the world does not mean they are saying you aren't worth as much as "normal" people. I would, in fact, argue quite the opposite. If someone enjoyed watching you suffer, they'd suggest having more CF children. If they see you suffering and don't like it, they are more likely to discourage it.
<i>Edited to add: I am not saying a person should or shouldn't abort a CF fetus, I am merely responding to a reply a few before mine.</i></end quote></div>
Part of it was her dissmissive attitude. This was a prepregnancy consultation. She knew we were going to have genetic testing beforehand, and that if my DH was a carrier, we wouldn't be trying.
I told her how I felt, (and in no uncertain terms) and she obviously thought that a life that would have suffering in it would be a life not worth living, to the point of killing a child before he/she was born. She also implied that I didn't know my own mind (ever have a dr. like that? Grr...) and would change it if faced with the reality- even though we wouldn't be doing the testing during pregnancy? She just <i>assumed</i> we would be doing the tests, too...
I want a high risk ob/gyn who is going to do everything she can for me and my unborn child, without me having that thought in the back of my head that if my child came back with cf or another potentially devastating disease, that she would be thinking that if something went wrong with my pregnancy, it would be for the best instead of having full confidence in her that she would exhaust all possible solutions and fully inform me of what they are. Doctors are human, and people put more effort into things they believe in.
Sorry, but someone who looks at me in my rare, but as the meds improve, increasingly less rare good health, and still would have advised my mother to abort me based solely on genetic testing, kinda pisses me off. When I was born, the doctors told my parents I wouldn't live past 3. When I went for the consultation, I believe the median was late 20's, early 30's (would have to look that up).
Even now that I'm not as healthy as I was 13 years ago, it still irks me. If I had a child with cf, it would be up to my child to decide when to quit fighting, it's not up to me before she's even born. IMHO <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> . To me, once a child is conceived (and especially at the point where they can do the testing) he/she is already "in this world", and deserves just as much of a chance at life as a cf child whose parents didn't know she had cf before she was born. Again, IMHO; not trying to make anyone mad or hurt anyone's feelings <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> .
Just because someone discourages bringing more CF children into the world does not mean they are saying you aren't worth as much as "normal" people. I would, in fact, argue quite the opposite. If someone enjoyed watching you suffer, they'd suggest having more CF children. If they see you suffering and don't like it, they are more likely to discourage it.
<i>Edited to add: I am not saying a person should or shouldn't abort a CF fetus, I am merely responding to a reply a few before mine.</i></end quote></div>
Part of it was her dissmissive attitude. This was a prepregnancy consultation. She knew we were going to have genetic testing beforehand, and that if my DH was a carrier, we wouldn't be trying.
I told her how I felt, (and in no uncertain terms) and she obviously thought that a life that would have suffering in it would be a life not worth living, to the point of killing a child before he/she was born. She also implied that I didn't know my own mind (ever have a dr. like that? Grr...) and would change it if faced with the reality- even though we wouldn't be doing the testing during pregnancy? She just <i>assumed</i> we would be doing the tests, too...
I want a high risk ob/gyn who is going to do everything she can for me and my unborn child, without me having that thought in the back of my head that if my child came back with cf or another potentially devastating disease, that she would be thinking that if something went wrong with my pregnancy, it would be for the best instead of having full confidence in her that she would exhaust all possible solutions and fully inform me of what they are. Doctors are human, and people put more effort into things they believe in.
Sorry, but someone who looks at me in my rare, but as the meds improve, increasingly less rare good health, and still would have advised my mother to abort me based solely on genetic testing, kinda pisses me off. When I was born, the doctors told my parents I wouldn't live past 3. When I went for the consultation, I believe the median was late 20's, early 30's (would have to look that up).
Even now that I'm not as healthy as I was 13 years ago, it still irks me. If I had a child with cf, it would be up to my child to decide when to quit fighting, it's not up to me before she's even born. IMHO <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> . To me, once a child is conceived (and especially at the point where they can do the testing) he/she is already "in this world", and deserves just as much of a chance at life as a cf child whose parents didn't know she had cf before she was born. Again, IMHO; not trying to make anyone mad or hurt anyone's feelings <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif" border="0"> .
Yes this is a very personal question. I don't think there is a right or wrong answer. Only the parents involved can make that decision. For my husband and me the answer was no. We spent 5 years deciding if we would get pregnant again. I still remember going to our older daughters clinic appointment and telling the Doctor, we were pregnant. The Doc said, Ok I want you to go for Genetic counselling. I burst into tears, saying you can't make me get rid of my baby. The Doctor said, No,No, thats not what I'm trying to do, I just want You to be informed, and I don't want you coming back to me saying, You didn't tell me etc. So long story short, for me the answer is no.
Yes this is a very personal question. I don't think there is a right or wrong answer. Only the parents involved can make that decision. For my husband and me the answer was no. We spent 5 years deciding if we would get pregnant again. I still remember going to our older daughters clinic appointment and telling the Doctor, we were pregnant. The Doc said, Ok I want you to go for Genetic counselling. I burst into tears, saying you can't make me get rid of my baby. The Doctor said, No,No, thats not what I'm trying to do, I just want You to be informed, and I don't want you coming back to me saying, You didn't tell me etc. So long story short, for me the answer is no.
Yes this is a very personal question. I don't think there is a right or wrong answer. Only the parents involved can make that decision. For my husband and me the answer was no. We spent 5 years deciding if we would get pregnant again. I still remember going to our older daughters clinic appointment and telling the Doctor, we were pregnant. The Doc said, Ok I want you to go for Genetic counselling. I burst into tears, saying you can't make me get rid of my baby. The Doctor said, No,No, thats not what I'm trying to do, I just want You to be informed, and I don't want you coming back to me saying, You didn't tell me etc. So long story short, for me the answer is no.
I'm of the dissenters who would abort, for several reasons. I saw how Ry suffered in the last year of his life, and I would never put anyone through that. I saw how his parents suffered in knowing they had given him the disease that was killing him. And like Kevin, I think it makes a counterproductive statement, CF is bad enough that we need a cure now, and yet it's okay to have more kids with it because it's 'not so bad'? That last statement applies more to chancing more kids, rather than truly not knowing you were both carriers, but I believe it could apply here.
I'm of the dissenters who would abort, for several reasons. I saw how Ry suffered in the last year of his life, and I would never put anyone through that. I saw how his parents suffered in knowing they had given him the disease that was killing him. And like Kevin, I think it makes a counterproductive statement, CF is bad enough that we need a cure now, and yet it's okay to have more kids with it because it's 'not so bad'? That last statement applies more to chancing more kids, rather than truly not knowing you were both carriers, but I believe it could apply here.
I'm of the dissenters who would abort, for several reasons. I saw how Ry suffered in the last year of his life, and I would never put anyone through that. I saw how his parents suffered in knowing they had given him the disease that was killing him. And like Kevin, I think it makes a counterproductive statement, CF is bad enough that we need a cure now, and yet it's okay to have more kids with it because it's 'not so bad'? That last statement applies more to chancing more kids, rather than truly not knowing you were both carriers, but I believe it could apply here.