Need to vent

[tarheel]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Havoc</b></i> Is it also not demeaning to chastise a person who replies with a message intended to inspire hope? If I were Scanboyd, I'd be livid at the flaming his post has received. So, let me see if I understand. On this forum we are supposed to vent/complain and everyone else should then chime in with their vents, but nobody is supposed to offer a positive response or advice because we don't want to marginalize peoples pain? So the next time you go to the doc and your PFT's are down your doc says, "well I don't want to marginalize your pain, so I'm really not going to give you any advice or antibiotics, but my wife just left me and I had a flat tire this morning and then a bird pooped in my triple shot espresso. OMG my life sucks so bad." I realize that people need to vent. I read this thread when it was first posted and didn't have a problem with it. What got me was everyone flaming Scanboyd for actually posting something positive (oh the horror!) and I had to respond to hopefully show people how petty they are being (not the OP BTW, but those who continually flame). If more people had his outlook, the forum would be a much better place.
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Sometimes you don't need a better place with a "more positive outlook". Aaaannnd I'm just sayin' when your PFTs are in the tube hearing from a person who has had a successful life despite cf isn't what you need or want, it just makes you angry and bitter and think either why is their life better and they're OLD and I might never get there or yeah it's easy for them to be positive because they've lived a fulfilled life outside of CF. (most CF marriages end in divorce) and therefore CF must not truly consume their life to the degree that it does for some people (*clears throat* MissT (I'd presume) and I) And yes, the purpose of a venting board is to VENT. Vent. and then walk away, sigh, cry, and then get up tommrow, put a brave face on and do it all over again. I agree with hmw too.

 

[tarheel]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Havoc</b></i> Is it also not demeaning to chastise a person who replies with a message intended to inspire hope? If I were Scanboyd, I'd be livid at the flaming his post has received. So, let me see if I understand. On this forum we are supposed to vent/complain and everyone else should then chime in with their vents, but nobody is supposed to offer a positive response or advice because we don't want to marginalize peoples pain? So the next time you go to the doc and your PFT's are down your doc says, "well I don't want to marginalize your pain, so I'm really not going to give you any advice or antibiotics, but my wife just left me and I had a flat tire this morning and then a bird pooped in my triple shot espresso. OMG my life sucks so bad." I realize that people need to vent. I read this thread when it was first posted and didn't have a problem with it. What got me was everyone flaming Scanboyd for actually posting something positive (oh the horror!) and I had to respond to hopefully show people how petty they are being (not the OP BTW, but those who continually flame). If more people had his outlook, the forum would be a much better place.
</end quote>
Sometimes you don't need a better place with a "more positive outlook". Aaaannnd I'm just sayin' when your PFTsare in the tube hearing from a person who hashad a successful life despite cf isn't what you need or want, itjust makesyou angry and bitter andthink either why is their life better and they're OLD and I might never get there or yeah it's easy for them to be positive because they've lived a fulfilled life outside of CF. (most CF marriagesend in divorce) and therefore CF must not truly consume their life tothe degree that it does for some people (*clears throat* MissT (I'd presume) and I) And yes, the purpose of a venting board is to VENT. Vent. and then walk away, sigh, cry, and then get up tommrow, put abrave face on and do it all over again. I agree with hmw too.

 

[tarheel]

<p><div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote><i>Originally posted by: <b>Havoc</b></i> Is it also not demeaning to chastise a person who replies with a message intended to inspire hope? If I were Scanboyd, I'd be livid at the flaming his post has received. So, let me see if I understand. On this forum we are supposed to vent/complain and everyone else should then chime in with their vents, but nobody is supposed to offer a positive response or advice because we don't want to marginalize peoples pain? So the next time you go to the doc and your PFT's are down your doc says, "well I don't want to marginalize your pain, so I'm really not going to give you any advice or antibiotics, but my wife just left me and I had a flat tire this morning and then a bird pooped in my triple shot espresso. OMG my life sucks so bad." I realize that people need to vent. I read this thread when it was first posted and didn't have a problem with it. What got me was everyone flaming Scanboyd for actually posting something positive (oh the horror!) and I had to respond to hopefully show people how petty they are being (not the OP BTW, but those who continually flame). If more people had his outlook, the forum would be a much better place.
<p></end quote>
<p>Sometimes you don't need a better place with a "more positive outlook". Aaaannnd I'm just sayin' when your PFTsare in the tube hearing from a person who hashad a successful life despite cf isn't what you need or want, itjust makesyou angry and bitter andthink either why is their life better and they're OLD and I might never get there or yeah it's easy for them to be positive because they've lived a fulfilled life outside of CF. (most CF marriagesend in divorce) and therefore CF must not truly consume their life tothe degree that it does for some people (*clears throat* MissT (I'd presume) and I) And yes, the purpose of a venting board is to VENT. Vent. and then walk away, sigh, cry, and then get up tommrow, put abrave face on and do it all over again. I agree with hmw too.

 

[hmw]

I didn't mean to make things worse with my last post.

I was mostly making the point where- there is a place for each type of response; sometimes we need people to relate to how we are feeling, sometimes we need people to help cheer us up, other times it's practical advice we are after. It makes me think of real life situations where sometimes we want advice but at other times when people try to 'fix' things it rubs us the wrong way because we simply need an ear and empathy.

 

[hmw]

I didn't mean to make things worse with my last post.

I was mostly making the point where- there is a place for each type of response; sometimes we need people to relate to how we are feeling, sometimes we need people to help cheer us up, other times it's practical advice we are after. It makes me think of real life situations where sometimes we want advice but at other times when people try to 'fix' things it rubs us the wrong way because we simply need an ear and empathy.

 

[hmw]

I didn't mean to make things worse with my last post.
<br />
<br />I was mostly making the point where- there is a place for each type of response; sometimes we need people to relate to how we are feeling, sometimes we need people to help cheer us up, other times it's practical advice we are after. It makes me think of real life situations where sometimes we want advice but at other times when people try to 'fix' things it rubs us the wrong way because we simply need an ear and empathy.

 

[krisgabes]

MissT, I can very much relate to the way you have been feeling lately. The past month and a half I have been having crisis after crisis. Sometimes CF related and other times just life. I'm the only person in my family with CF so no one really understands what I'm going through, but I am grateful that more people are beginning to verbalize that to me lately. You have every right to feel the way you do. We're all entitled on here to feel like that. You know the dark road won't last forever but sometimes we need some help to get to the light. And that's what we're all here for. As another poster on here said, we will all stand 3 feet away and give each other hugs! lol I can't take credit for that joke, it wasn't mine! If you ever want to vent and maybe don't want to post it, please feel free to PM me. I hope you're feeling better soon <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[krisgabes]

MissT, I can very much relate to the way you have been feeling lately. The past month and a half I have been having crisis after crisis. Sometimes CF related and other times just life. I'm the only person in my family with CF so no one really understands what I'm going through, but I am grateful that more people are beginning to verbalize that to me lately. You have every right to feel the way you do. We're all entitled on here to feel like that. You know the dark road won't last forever but sometimes we need some help to get to the light. And that's what we're all here for. As another poster on here said, we will all stand 3 feet away and give each other hugs! lol I can't take credit for that joke, it wasn't mine! If you ever want to vent and maybe don't want to post it, please feel free to PM me. I hope you're feeling better soon <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[krisgabes]

MissT, I can very much relate to the way you have been feeling lately. The past month and a half I have been having crisis after crisis. Sometimes CF related and other times just life. I'm the only person in my family with CF so no one really understands what I'm going through, but I am grateful that more people are beginning to verbalize that to me lately. You have every right to feel the way you do. We're all entitled on here to feel like that. You know the dark road won't last forever but sometimes we need some help to get to the light. And that's what we're all here for. As another poster on here said, we will all stand 3 feet away and give each other hugs! lol I can't take credit for that joke, it wasn't mine! If you ever want to vent and maybe don't want to post it, please feel free to PM me. I hope you're feeling better soon <img src="i/expressions/face-icon-small-smile.gif" border="0">

 

[nmw615]

I'm a naturally happy person, and I strongly believe that just finding a reason to smile at least once a day can really help a person feel better. That said, there are many, many times when I feel down and have to vent. I know my life could be so much worse, but I also know I was dealt a pretty sucky hand in life. There are days when I just want to sit in the dark and wallow in how much my life sucks. Then there are days when I feel okay and really good about life. It just happens. Venting helps so much, and having this forum as a place to go and read that other people actually know what we're talking about, helps tremendously.

And no offense to scanboyd, but sometimes people just want to be angry and sad. I know your heart was in the right place, and some days, your words are just the thing I need to turn my day around. However, other days, those words end up making me angrier. It just depends on the day. Thank you for bringing a shot of optimism to the thread.

 

[nmw615]

I'm a naturally happy person, and I strongly believe that just finding a reason to smile at least once a day can really help a person feel better. That said, there are many, many times when I feel down and have to vent. I know my life could be so much worse, but I also know I was dealt a pretty sucky hand in life. There are days when I just want to sit in the dark and wallow in how much my life sucks. Then there are days when I feel okay and really good about life. It just happens. Venting helps so much, and having this forum as a place to go and read that other people actually know what we're talking about, helps tremendously.

And no offense to scanboyd, but sometimes people just want to be angry and sad. I know your heart was in the right place, and some days, your words are just the thing I need to turn my day around. However, other days, those words end up making me angrier. It just depends on the day. Thank you for bringing a shot of optimism to the thread.

 

[nmw615]

I'm a naturally happy person, and I strongly believe that just finding a reason to smile at least once a day can really help a person feel better. That said, there are many, many times when I feel down and have to vent. I know my life could be so much worse, but I also know I was dealt a pretty sucky hand in life. There are days when I just want to sit in the dark and wallow in how much my life sucks. Then there are days when I feel okay and really good about life. It just happens. Venting helps so much, and having this forum as a place to go and read that other people actually know what we're talking about, helps tremendously.
<br />
<br />And no offense to scanboyd, but sometimes people just want to be angry and sad. I know your heart was in the right place, and some days, your words are just the thing I need to turn my day around. However, other days, those words end up making me angrier. It just depends on the day. Thank you for bringing a shot of optimism to the thread.

 

[Havoc]

Wow, I must be one happy CFer then and there are more like me. I know a kid, through Facebook, who has a J-tube, PFT's are in the toilet and he's listed for a transplant (but currently inactive). I've yet to see a "woe is me" post. He actually seems like a really fun guy to be around. It's all about what you choose to focus on. Apparently, quite a few of you choose to focus on the negative. Carry on.

 

[Havoc]

Wow, I must be one happy CFer then and there are more like me. I know a kid, through Facebook, who has a J-tube, PFT's are in the toilet and he's listed for a transplant (but currently inactive). I've yet to see a "woe is me" post. He actually seems like a really fun guy to be around. It's all about what you choose to focus on. Apparently, quite a few of you choose to focus on the negative. Carry on.

 

[Havoc]

Wow, I must be one happy CFer then and there are more like me. I know a kid, through Facebook, who has a J-tube, PFT's are in the toilet and he's listed for a transplant (but currently inactive). I've yet to see a "woe is me" post. He actually seems like a really fun guy to be around. It's all about what you choose to focus on. Apparently, quite a few of you choose to focus on the negative. Carry on.

 

[hmw]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>It's all about what you choose to focus on. Apparently, quite a few of you choose to focus on the negative. Carry on.</end quote></div>
An occasional vent or rant does not equal ones mindset for life. it can often help one MAINTAIN a generally positive outlook on life. I vent to those who 'get' the cf junk so it doesn't take over the rest of my life.

The FB friend who is so ill and potentially on his way to a transplant and so happy and fun all the time? He may have real-life friends, family or a therapist who hear anger, pain and ranting that he never expresses to the FB world. One never knows.

 

[hmw]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>It's all about what you choose to focus on. Apparently, quite a few of you choose to focus on the negative. Carry on.</end quote>
An occasional vent or rant does not equal ones mindset for life. it can often help one MAINTAIN a generally positive outlook on life. I vent to those who 'get' the cf junk so it doesn't take over the rest of my life.

The FB friend who is so ill and potentially on his way to a transplant and so happy and fun all the time? He may have real-life friends, family or a therapist who hear anger, pain and ranting that he never expresses to the FB world. One never knows.

 

[hmw]

<div class="FTQUOTE"><begin quote>It's all about what you choose to focus on. Apparently, quite a few of you choose to focus on the negative. Carry on.</end quote>
<br />An occasional vent or rant does not equal ones mindset for life. it can often help one MAINTAIN a generally positive outlook on life. I vent to those who 'get' the cf junk so it doesn't take over the rest of my life.
<br />
<br />The FB friend who is so ill and potentially on his way to a transplant and so happy and fun all the time? He may have real-life friends, family or a therapist who hear anger, pain and ranting that he never expresses to the FB world. One never knows.
<br />

 

[Havoc]

Perhaps, but I do know that he left the Facebook CF sites because of all the negativity, so I'm inclined to think he has the same mindset as me. I will ask him sometime.

 

[Havoc]

Perhaps, but I do know that he left the Facebook CF sites because of all the negativity, so I'm inclined to think he has the same mindset as me. I will ask him sometime.