True Story - I can laugh now, but I wanted to die at the time.
I was 19 years old, and I had just gotten a new car.(not NEW, but new to me) Anyway I had been dating this girl for about a month and I was at her house. Well I felt a dump coming on and you all know what the smell is like, so there was no way in hel l I was using the toilet at her house. So I said my goodbyes and headed home. Now I lived about 17 miles from her, but I could jump on the interstate and be home in 10 minutes. Well I made it about half way and I had to either fart to get some pressure off or I was thinking I would wreck. I was in pain. So I eased up and ripped one. Well it was none other that an underwear load of orange badness. Well, not wanting to ruin my new seats with smell and stain, I swerved over on the emergency lane and jumped out. Luckily I was wearing a pair of basketball shorts under my jeans so it hadn't made it through just yet. But the stain was forming and it STUNK. Well I had no idea what to do, it was about 35 degrees, and I had crapped my pants. I wasn't about to put them back on so I walked to the passenger side and took off my underwear, shorts and jeans and threw them off in the bushes. Now I am naked from the waist down and 7 miles from home. I ran and jumped back in, cranked up the heater and drove home bare-as sed. I prayed I wouldn't get pulled over. When I got home, I didn't think my mom and dad would like to see my business hangig out and I didn't feel like retelling the tale, so I called inside on my cell phone and had them go back to their bedroom. While they were there I bolted in the house and ran to my room. To this day my mom still doesn't know what I was doing. Hhahahahaha
I was 19 years old, and I had just gotten a new car.(not NEW, but new to me) Anyway I had been dating this girl for about a month and I was at her house. Well I felt a dump coming on and you all know what the smell is like, so there was no way in hel l I was using the toilet at her house. So I said my goodbyes and headed home. Now I lived about 17 miles from her, but I could jump on the interstate and be home in 10 minutes. Well I made it about half way and I had to either fart to get some pressure off or I was thinking I would wreck. I was in pain. So I eased up and ripped one. Well it was none other that an underwear load of orange badness. Well, not wanting to ruin my new seats with smell and stain, I swerved over on the emergency lane and jumped out. Luckily I was wearing a pair of basketball shorts under my jeans so it hadn't made it through just yet. But the stain was forming and it STUNK. Well I had no idea what to do, it was about 35 degrees, and I had crapped my pants. I wasn't about to put them back on so I walked to the passenger side and took off my underwear, shorts and jeans and threw them off in the bushes. Now I am naked from the waist down and 7 miles from home. I ran and jumped back in, cranked up the heater and drove home bare-as sed. I prayed I wouldn't get pulled over. When I got home, I didn't think my mom and dad would like to see my business hangig out and I didn't feel like retelling the tale, so I called inside on my cell phone and had them go back to their bedroom. While they were there I bolted in the house and ran to my room. To this day my mom still doesn't know what I was doing. Hhahahahaha